Dating is a tremendous step in one’s life. Before dating, you need some preparation. Dating is not something you should just jump into without making any prior personal changes or decisions. You should look at yourself and set your standards.

Some people with disabilities think no one will want them or fall in love with them simply because of their disability. They might become desperate and date people who are not right for them, but figure no one better will come along. This attitude is not only wrong, but it is unhealthy. Know that you are worth someone special regardless of your limitations. You are a unique, lovable human being. Do not fall for just anyone, because you will not be happy. Set your standards, and go after a person who meets them. Don’t be afraid to set high standards, but remember no one is perfect.

Fall in love with yourself before loving someone else. If you want to lose weight, eat healthy, update your wardrobe or be more social, then do it. You can become the person you want to be. Do things on your own and get to know your tastes. People usually seek partners that can function without them, but choose to be with them. You need to build a life of your own before building a life with another person.

A positive attitude about yourself and others is always welcome. Who wants to date someone who has a negative attitude? Sure, at times, everyone needs to complain about their disability or lives, but it can get annoying if this is all you do. Smile, complain less, treat every day as a gift — even the bad days. Look for something to be happy about and a positive attitude will be yours.

Dating is a great learning experience. If you know yourself, set standards and remain positive, dating will be satisfying. You deserve respect and happiness regardless of a disability. When you settle for anything less, then you probably will not be happy.

Jessica McFarlane writes and teaches about relationships. Contact her at mailto:talkaboutlove@icanonline.net

Incanonline.net
March 27, 2000